yea again its been a while but hey i got news to tell2012-07-22 / 12:46
sry guys - damn 3 months no posting! but so much happened!
alex , my parents and my sister and i went to an america road-trip for 2 weeks - we have made bunch of photos - but even my dad haven't got his birthday photoalbum from this trip yet - so yeah we are as hell busy with everything. but here is one of alex + me in miami beach (yeah no photoshop with all our wahhh normal skin) and me in one of the huge hotels we were staying (there were NO people - and everything was so HUGE and empty - best thing when you are travelling off-season :D) and my sister and i when i am checking my bimples in new york (yeah my sister is the beauty in our family - i am more the tomboy with no makeup, burping and stuff (my mom put the nail-polish on my fingers! she said i have to act more like a lady while i am with her) )
big news: we are moving AGAIN. yes again. to "stuttgart" - why that? because we miss our families and the good beer you can only drink in the south. and yeah..other reasons. quite sirious reasons for me..in the part of germany where i am living at the moment there is a whole lot of racism and i can only tell by comparing where i lived before, that this area is the worse i ever lived in. eventhough "hanover" is worse. in munich - where i lived the longest - i have been verbally attacked once in 10 years and not once physically. since i live in north-rhine-westfalia i was verbally and physically attacked 9 times in 2 years. and i do neither live in the ghetto nor do i work in some shit-skinhead-neo-nazi area. even if i go for walks i hear the "Nig.."-Word - so i was like - FUCK THAT I AM MOVING!
another really big reason to me is that my mother lost his younger brother not long ago and i just wanted to be near here. so why not munich again? alex got a great job offer in stuttgart at BLACK THORN TATTOOs with the lovely and great talented tattoo-artist kelu and his co owner & girlfriend and also great tattoo artist susa. they are both so creative and loving. i think alex can do his next steps there eventhough i think he loved the time in at Lifetime Tattoos with his mentor Frank and Andre.
the only thing that was keeping me here for so long was my really really GREAT job. i really do love the folks over there. petra our text-chief is just as cute as a button and maria the is as cute as a button and pure sunshine too. my boss is just the best boss i have ever had and joerg and lars are the best guys i have ever worked with. i love this agency but i really can not live in duesseldorf any longer. i feel shit here. really shit. i quit my gym because i was attacked there, i do not go for walks anymore the fucking museums are too expensive and the town is getting just more ugly to me as more shit i get from the people who live here. and i am really sorry for alex - he loves me just the way i am but he could never help me with this - cause it is a fact - he really does not know how it is to be black and to be bullied for the skin color. if someone would say "fuck you" or "girl you are just not my type" that would be ok. or if somebody would say "girl you are annoying" ok..i could handle this - but to insult me because i have a certain skin color is just disturbing me and it got me depressed. i have NEVER questioned my behavior before - and i have NEVER thought about "black and white" before - but for the first time i really feel like i am some strange somewhat who has to be nice all the time because otherwise they would say "this stupid black girl was so not friendly" instead of "this stupid girl was so not friendly" ... it is just fucking my mind. it was so teribble i thought it would be better if alex would have a nice white girlfriend so he won't have to listen to my whining thoughts all the time. yes i was thinking about breaking up with him because i was not happy with myself anymore - and how could i make him happy if i couldn't even make myself happy? alex just did the cutest thing he could ever do - he asked if i want to marry him - and well - i said yes! so yes boys and girls i am engaged now. but we will first move and alex and i want to have real "boring and quiet" life first before we both say "yes". so after all this stupid-dick-heads who called me names - i thank them for getting married next year in january.
so yes we got a new flat in stuttgart. we have to pay it already wht is quite tough because we also have to pay the rent in our current flat - but if we would not have done this - we couldnt have the flat. and it is really great. 3 big rooms - 1 big floor and a tiny bathroom and a tiny kitchen - exactly what i wanted! YES! 90 qm of heaven! but guys let me tell you - i really do not want to move again for the next 5 years. its fucking expensive (this moving will cost us around 7-8k with the double renting - and we need new furniture and a new kitchen aaah) and packing your stuff after you are thinking "uuhh this flat looks quite nice now" is a strange feeling. and i really love the new flat. it is not in the middle of the city like our current flat but it is near enough - in the best neighborhood in stuttgart (west) and really near the nature and forrest. i miss nature a lot since we lived in the center of the town for so long.
beside this i am getting my first little babysteps into tattooing. i can not tell you more right now but be sure you will know about it first ;) i think i will quit the lollipop-making because its just too time intenisve - eventhough we are earning really good money with it (so many weddings want our lollipops :)). but we started another thing with fashion jewelry (take a look here) and this is fun and just does not take that much time. we will see...
and one last picture from alex from the amazing pixar venue we went today! i love to do things with alex :D
Few is the number who think with their own minds and feel with their own hearts.
about me...
Oh, HI!
Hello sweethearts! here i tell you a lil bit about myself. Something "private" to give you a lil bit of sugar.
1988 i was born in munich - you know that city in germany with the oktoberfest and beer and fat germans who only eat "prezels" and sausages. i am vegetarian btw. my mother is african and my dad german. we moved around a lot when i was a kid - but
i never mind evengthough i think thats that the reason why i cant get really personal with ppl.
i was a wild teenager - with alcohol, too much partying and too much kissing around - and never had a real boyfriend cause i loved my freedom!
and then i met alex who is my boyfriend now... we meet at an art-fest in munich and somehow we stuck together and i really do love him!
i was always intrested in art. my grandparents were both architects and artists. i remember my first painting i gave my grandpa for present was
a skeleton of a squirrel. i think i knew that i would be a lil bit metal by heart then haha!
i got my first tattoo when i was 12 or 14...cant remember but i do remember that my mom just asked me if i want one cause my sister was getting one
and sure i said yes - cause i always wanted exactly the same what my big sister tatiana got!
so thats it - here you see my WIP work and love. i hope you enjoy it.
-That's me
I used to go away for weeks... in a state of confusion.
this part is still under construction! wait and see.
A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.
